NEW DELHI—In a bold move that economists are calling either ‘visionary’ or ‘mildly provocative,’ India’s government unveiled an annual budget Tuesday that essentially dares the global economy to mess with it. Finance Minister Nirmala Sitharaman revealed a historic allocation to infrastructure and manufacturing, pausing only to glare menacingly at a PowerPoint slide labeled ‘Global Trade War: Bring It On.’

‘We looked at the volatile financial markets, the collapsing trade alliances, and the general economic chaos,’ explained budget architect Girish Chandrashekhar. ‘So we thought, what better time to double down on bridges, bullet trains, and make-at-home smartphone chargers?’

The budget includes a record-breaking 8 trillion rupees for new roadways, 15 fresh manufacturing parks, and what insiders are calling ‘the world’s most optimistic spreadsheet.’ ‘We’re basically spending money like everyone else is about to stop existing,’ admitted Deputy Minister Rekha Sharma. ‘Our motto this year is, If you build it, maybe someone will come.’

Analysts on global trade accused India of reckless optimism. ‘It’s a courageous message in these uncertain times,’ said Rajiv Banerjee of the Market Pundits’ Collective. ‘I mean, filling potholes while the rest of the world is digging metaphorical ones? That’s next-level confidence.’

Meanwhile, India’s ministry of optimism is already running victory laps. ‘The only thing more unstable than international trade is our faith in the world not exploding,’ said spokesperson Aakash Patel. ‘And look, if all else fails, at least our new highways will make escaping the collapse much smoother.’