• Entertainment

Ava DuVernay Announces Ambitious Plan to Make Documentaries About All Amendments By 2046, Netflix Hires Team of Constitutional Historians to Keep Up

Chester P. NonsenseJuly 17, 2026

Ava DuVernay announces her new Netflix documentary about the 14th Amendment, sparking an arms race of constitutional filmmaking and confusion in Congress.

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• Entertainment

Netflix Unveils ‘Stranger Things: VHS Edition,’ Announces New Plans for ‘LaserDisc Cut,’ ‘Etch-a-Sketch Version’ by 2027

Penny PunchlineJuly 16, 2026

Netflix releases a VHS-filtered version of Stranger Things and announces plans for even more absurd retro re-releases to keep the nostalgia alive.

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• Entertainment

Netflix Unveils ‘Maelstrom’: 33-Year-Old Action Script Reanimated In Bid To Corner Nostalgic Aging-Script Demographic

Gloria HyperboleJuly 15, 2026

Netflix is in talks with actor Alan Ritchson to star in 'Maelstrom,' an action movie based on a decades-old script originally sold to Warner Bros. in 1993.

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• Entertainment

Paramount Warns That Blocking Warner Bros. Merger Will Leave Americans Defenseless Against ‘Unprecedented Levels of Original Content’

Veronica TruthbombJuly 14, 2026

Paramount warns that halting its merger with Warner Bros. Discovery would plunge America into chaos by allowing Netflix and tech companies to create too much original content for the public to handle.

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• Entertainment

Disney Shocked To Learn Audiences Tire Of Watching Polynesian Princesses Turn Into CGI Rocks For Two Hours

Buck MulliganJuly 13, 2026

Disney’s $250 million live-action Moana remake opens to disappointing box office numbers, leaving executives baffled as audiences tire of endless CGI remakes.

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• Entertainment

Nation Stunned to Learn ‘Police Academy 2’ Had Characters, Mourns Passing of Guy Who Played One

Larry LiteralistJuly 12, 2026

Peter Van Norden, an actor best known for his role in 'Police Academy 2,' has died at 75, prompting a wave of confusion and nostalgic tributes from people who just realized he existed.

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• Entertainment

Disney Plus Promises Free Streaming Tier Featuring All Your Least Favorite Content

Penny PunchlineJuly 11, 2026

Disney Plus is reportedly considering a free streaming tier populated with less desirable and largely unwatchable content to attract budget-conscious viewers.

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• Entertainment

Colman Domingo Reveals Lifelong Dream of Adding Even More Hyphens to Job Title by 2025

Veronica TruthbombJuly 10, 2026

Colman Domingo announced at the Frameline Film Festival his ambitious plan to expand his multi-hyphenate job title to unprecedented lengths, inspiring both awe and exhaustion in the entertainment industry.

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• Entertainment

HBO Max Sweeps Emmy Nominations, Promises Next Year’s Hit Will Just Be 60 Hours of Static with Prestige Lighting

Buck MulliganJuly 9, 2026

HBO Max's 'The Pitt' dominated Emmy nominations, prompting the platform to further embrace prestige by announcing even more avant-garde, somber programming.

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• Entertainment

Jermaine Dupri Sues Sony for $18 Million, Demands Payment in Obsolete CD Singles and Mariah Carey Whispers

Chester P. NonsenseJuly 8, 2026

Jermaine Dupri has filed an $18 million lawsuit against Sony Music Entertainment, alleging unpaid royalties from hits by Mariah Carey, Usher, and other artists.

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