• Economy

Australians Celebrate Housing Market Crash as Once-In-A-Lifetime Opportunity to Finally Lose All Their Savings

Larry LiteralistSeptember 2, 2026

Australian homeowners and investors rejoice as rapidly falling house prices provide a unique chance to experience the thrill of financial ruin.

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• Economy

U.S. Introduces ‘Operation Economic Outcast 2: Sanctions Harder’, Promises To Throw Iran’s Economy Down Further Flight of Stairs

Veronica TruthbombSeptember 1, 2026

The U.S. escalates its sanctions program against Iran, aiming to worsen an already collapsing economy by targeting increasingly trivial sectors.

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• Economy

Man Who Reincarnates Failed Company as ‘Phoenix’ Shocked When It Immediately Bursts Into Flames Again

Larry LiteralistAugust 31, 2026

A recruiter who repurchased his failed company's assets, erasing millions in debt, quickly placed the new firm into liquidation after failing to make promised payments.

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• Economy

Israeli Army Responds to Settler Rampage by Boldly Arresting Local Palestinians for Inconvenient Proximity to Violence

Penny PunchlineAugust 30, 2026

Israeli soldiers arrested six Palestinians in Qusra following a violent attack on the village by Israeli settlers.

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• Economy

Federal Reserve Chair Promises To Deliver ‘Stable Prices’ With Bold Plan To Randomly Change Interest Rates Until Something Works

Chester P. NonsenseAugust 29, 2026

Federal Reserve Chair Kevin Warsh promises to deliver stable prices while refusing to specify future interest rate changes, leaving investors baffled.

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• Economy

Desperate US Navy Launches GoFundMe to Finance Trump’s Endless War on Iran: ‘Every $10 Buys One Bullet!’

Penny PunchlineAugust 28, 2026

Struggling to finance its involvement in Trump's protracted war on Iran, the US Navy resorts to crowdfunding and lemonade stands as funds and munitions run dry.

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• Economy

Americans Brace for ‘Dry Wiping Era’ as Canada Slaps Tariffs on Toilet Paper: Government Recommends ‘Old T-Shirts, Leaves, and Dignity Loss Mitigation Strategies’

Buck MulliganAugust 27, 2026

Amid a trade war with Canada, the US faces soaring toilet paper prices and government-issued advice on alternative wiping methods.

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• Economy

Iran Calls New US Sanctions ‘Desperate’; Americans Forced to Invent Even Harsher Adjectives

Larry LiteralistAugust 26, 2026

Iran's foreign minister mocks fresh US sanctions as 'desperate' while the US struggles to invent new ways to punish Iran's already battered economy.

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• Economy

GoFundMe Announces New ‘National Emergency’ Feature To Replace Federal Government By 2025

Chester P. NonsenseAugust 25, 2026

GoFundMe introduces a new feature allowing Americans to crowdfund national crises, with officials hinting it may soon replace the federal government for disaster response and essential services.

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• Economy

Iran Laughs Off ‘Desperate’ New US Sanctions, Suggests America Try Sending Fruit Basket Instead

Buck MulliganAugust 24, 2026

Iranian officials dismiss new US sanctions as a 'desperate' move, suggesting America try less aggressive gestures while the US vows even harsher economic penalties.

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