In a twist that career consultants everywhere are calling ‘an unconventional resume builder,’ 17 South African men are currently pleading with their government for help after discovering that their advertised ‘personal development course’ in Russia was, in fact, several seasons of live-action trench warfare in Ukraine.

The men, reportedly lured by Duduzile Zuma-Sambudla—daughter of former president Jacob Zuma and newly-minted travel influencer—claimed they were promised high-paying jobs as bodyguards and an opportunity to ‘find themselves’ spiritually. Instead, one attendee described the course as ‘less yoga, more ballistic exercises.’

‘We thought we’d be meditating and maybe learning Krav Maga,’ said Sipho Mbalula via WhatsApp while crouching behind a burnt-out vehicle. ‘Instead, I’ve learned how to assemble a Kalashnikov with my eyes closed, mostly because I’m too scared to open them.’

Russian course facilitator Alexei Bogdanov insisted there was ‘no bait-and-switch,’ adding, ‘We simply told them the course would be ‘hands-on.” He then handed out a pamphlet titled ‘The Five People You Meet in the Trenches.’

Meanwhile, Zuma-Sambudla denied all allegations, stating, ‘I never mentioned which frontline they’d be working on. These men are gaining invaluable skills in conflict resolution.’ She then tweeted, ‘NAMASTE FROM DONETSK.’

South African officials are now negotiating their return, noting, ‘We recommend all citizens carefully read the fine print when enrolling in international leadership programs, especially those promising ‘life-changing experiences.’