PALM BEACH, FL—In a dramatic move that experts are describing as “culinarily unprecedented,” Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu declared Monday that peace negotiations in Gaza would remain on hold until the world-famous Mar-a-Lago buffet returns the last of its original 12 secret herbs and spices.

“Justice must prevail, both for our people and for the Mar-a-Lago fried chicken,” Netanyahu asserted during a midnight press conference, flanked by grieving family members and Mar-a-Lago’s head chef, Pierre Delacroix, who reportedly wept silently throughout the proceedings. “How can we discuss something as grave as ceasefire while oregano remains unaccounted for?”

Netanyahu, on his fifth visit to Mar-a-Lago this year—one more than his total visits to the Knesset—was seen combing through the buffet with a magnifying glass and a copy of “Colonel Sanders’ Autobiography.” Israeli officials confirmed that the negotiations would not proceed until the full seasoning profile was authenticated and returned by whoever had taken it, “likely Hamas, or possibly Jared Kushner.”

“For too long, the international community has ignored the suffering caused by incomplete spice rubs,” explained Rami Lebowitz, Netanyahu’s Undersecretary for Gastronomic Affairs, adding, “The people of Israel deserve paprika.”

Trump, appearing alongside Netanyahu in matching gold lamé robes, promised vigorous action. “We will leave no basil leaf unturned. Not on my watch, folks!” he declared, before showcasing a commemorative peace brisket.

Sources say talks are expected to resume immediately if the missing oregano or the spirit of Henry Kissinger reappears—whichever comes first.