LONDON — In a heartwarming display of Yuletide spirit and strategic financial mismanagement, Britons across the nation celebrated the season of giving by borrowing an extra £2.1 billion in consumer credit this November, according to the latest Bank of England figures. Experts say this is the fastest annual rate of credit card borrowing since the fabled “Great Festive Debt Race” of 2022, narrowly surpassing last year’s ambitious ‘Buy Now, Panic Later’ campaign.

“I love Christmas. I love the twinkling lights, the smell of pine, and the thrill of buying my toddler an iPad she’ll definitely smash by February,” said shopper Clive Hammersmith, as he braved the Oxford Street crowds while clutching six maxed-out credit cards. “Sure, I may have to remortgage my house to pay off this snowman with built-in karaoke, but isn’t that what the holidays are all about?”

Bank of England spokesperson Quentin Chipley described November’s borrowing surge as “an exciting sign that families are engaging in robust economic self-delusion.” He added, “It’s a festive tradition: mince pies, Secret Santa, and the annual interest rate spike. We even considered rebranding our loan officers as Christmas elves, but they threatened industrial action.”

Financial life coach Wendy Parsnip offered reassurance, advising, “Remember, if you can’t afford all your presents in one go, just spread them across twelve cards and act surprised when you get the bills. It’s like an advent calendar, but instead of chocolate, it’s mounting anxiety.”

Government officials insist the trend is under control, with plans to launch a new ‘Debt-for-Presents’ voucher scheme next year, allowing consumers to conveniently transfer their credit card balances onto commemorative Christmas baubles.