SAN FRANCISCO—In a stunning revelation at San Francisco’s Frameline Film Festival, acclaimed actor-writer-producer Colman Domingo announced his ongoing quest to become the most hyphenated individual in Hollywood history by 2025. Domingo, already celebrated for his triple-hyphenate status, told a rapturous crowd that he hopes to soon add director, barista, key grip, and podcast-host to his growing resume.

“I always knew I was destined for something bigger than a simple career,” Domingo confessed while balancing a clipboard, a screenplay, and a soy latte. “My organizational chart is now mostly dashes.” Festival organizers confirmed Domingo required three separate badges: one for acting, one for writing, and one simply labeled ‘Creator of Miscellaneous Stuff.’

Domingo’s relentless hyphen acquisition has not gone unnoticed within the industry. “He once pitched himself to direct, star, and cater a project about himself making a documentary about himself,” said fellow attendee Lucia Trent, who describes herself as a director-writer-philanthropist-dog-mom. “Frankly, I’m just trying to catch up.”

Experts have begun to worry about the growing multi-hyphenate arms race. “By 2030, we estimate the average creative professional will require a footnote just to finish introducing themselves,” warned career analyst Rayleigh Kim. “We expect Domingo to pioneer the first quadruple-em dash.”

Festival volunteer and aspiring TikTok-chef-influencer, Jax Butler, simply sighed: “Someday I hope to fit as many titles as Colman on my LinkedIn before it crashes again.”