WASHINGTON, D.C.—In a stunning revelation that rocked absolutely no one but herself, outgoing Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene announced Wednesday that she was “just so naive” for believing Donald Trump was actually a man of the people, rather than the gold-plated billionaire and golf-course enthusiast he appeared to be.

“I honestly thought he lived in a split-level out in Canton, drove a used Chevy Silverado, and, I don’t know, had a collection of Dale Earnhardt memorabilia,” Greene confided to a New York Times reporter while polishing her QAnon cufflinks one last time. “Turns out, Mar-a-Lago isn’t even a strip mall.”

Close advisors revealed Greene’s illusion only fully shattered after she spotted Trump eyeing a $12 hamburger with open disgust at a campaign diner stop. “He asked if ‘regular people’ really ate fries without truffle oil,” said staffer Rick Daugsett, shaking his head. “That was when she started to question everything.”

Political strategist Brenda Pews added, “Marjorie’s learning curve is a little like a roller coaster but with fewer safety checks.”

Trump himself responded with measured empathy: “Frankly, I love the people. I think some of them are tremendous. But you can’t expect me to be a person of the people. I eat people food once a month. It’s called outreach.”

Greene plans to spend her post-congressional life discovering that Elon Musk doesn’t actually live in a tiny house either.