In a bid to help Americans dust away the crumbs of their shattered dreams, the Dreame X40 Ultra robovac is now a full $697 off—almost matching the price people paid to feel good about themselves during Black Friday.

The Dreame X40 Ultra, which vacuumed its way into hearts everywhere before the far superior X50 Ultra rendered it obsolete, is now yours for just $503, or roughly the price of six organic oat milk lattes in San Francisco. Sources confirm the ultra-advanced device will vacuum both your floors and your sense of consumer confidence, with Amazon promising, “This is the best deal you will get until we release another robovac next week.”

Early adopters have mixed feelings about the sale. “I finally snagged the X40 Ultra,” said tech enthusiast Clay Duncan, “and just as I finished setting it up, they announced the X50. My apartment is clean, but I’ll never be pure again.”

The X40’s AI-powered dirt detection, detachable mop pads, and self-emptying dustbin may have wowed customers in 2023, but the overshadowing X50 Ultra’s motorized swing arm and improved rollers have left buyers feeling like their robot is cleaning with one hand tied behind its back. “When my neighbor’s X50 rolled over my doorstep and did a triple axel onto her rug, I knew I was living in the past,” lamented proud but defeated X40 owner Marcia Feldman.

Still, Dreame spokesperson Jade “No Relation” Dyson insists: “The X40 Ultra is a great investment for anyone who cares about clean floors and not being haunted by the ghosts of next year’s upgrades.”

Experts recommend keeping the $697 you save on the X40 in your X50 fund, so you’re emotionally prepared for next week’s launch of the X51 Ultra Supreme.