In a major announcement that left defense officials scrambling to check Google Maps, former President Donald Trump declared Friday that the United States military had successfully wiped out a ‘big facility’ in Venezuela, possibly related to ships, oil, or, sources say, the country’s only Dave & Buster’s.

‘We hit them so hard, folks — very, very hard. Tremendous blow. It’s a big plant, or it might be a mall, but it’s definitely a facility,’ Trump revealed to stunned New York supermarket magnate John Catsimatidis, moments before asking if Catsimatidis had any coupons for the deli.

Pentagon spokesperson Colonel Jason Lint brushed off questions about the operation’s details. ‘We conducted a detailed strike on what may or may not have been a building,’ he explained. ‘The intel was unclear, but the president said it was the big one. Could be a refinery, could be a Home Depot. Either way, it’s knocked out.’

White House Press Secretary Muffin Sanders maintained the administration’s position of strategic ambiguity: ‘We can neither confirm nor deny the existence of both Venezuela and big facilities within it.’

Meanwhile, Venezuelan officials say all their major facilities remain intact, though local reports indicate a sudden national shortage of curly fries.

‘If the U.S. did strike, they should at least tell us what they were aiming for,’ Venezuelan defense minister Hector Oregano commented. ‘Our bingo hall is still here.’