SAN JOSÉ, COSTA RICA—In a surprise twist on the American Dream, Russian engineer Alexander Volkov and his family found themselves enjoying Costa Rica’s scenic airports this week after being deported from the United States as part of what officials described as the ‘Try Somewhere Else’ initiative.

The plan, masterminded by Trump-era logistical pioneer Chad ‘Chains Are a Precaution’ Miller, involves flying asylum seekers who request safety at the U.S. border directly into legal limbo in Central America. ‘We wanted to offer a fresh start in a country where they know absolutely no one, can’t work, and have nowhere to live,’ explained Miller, beaming. ‘It’s a win-win: they get sun, we get plausible deniability.’

Sources confirm the Volkov family was removed from the U.S. last February alongside a handful of others from 20 different countries, including 81 children, who were randomly selected based on their inability to find Costa Rica on a map. ‘When we asked for asylum, I thought maybe we’d get a court hearing, maybe a lawyer,’ said Alexander. ‘Instead, we got luggage tags.’

Costa Rican officials claim they were only slightly surprised. ‘We just assumed it was some kind of American reality show,’ remarked immigration spokesman Ernesto Salinas, shrugging. ‘We’re still waiting for the film crew.’

Despite repeated requests, the U.S. Department of Homeland Security maintained that ‘deporting people to a country they’ve never been to is technically not against the rules, as long as the paperwork is confusing enough.’