PAWTUCKET, RI — Hasbro CEO Chris Cocks announced today that beloved cartoon porcine Peppa Pig—now powered entirely by artificial intelligence—has been promoted to Chief Toy Designer, effective immediately. Peppa, whose experience in muddy puddles and mild mischief makes her ‘uniquely qualified for corporate leadership,’ will now oversee all creative operations, eliminating the need for pesky humans with their unpredictable ‘imagination.’

“Peppa’s first act was to pitch a Monopoly set consisting solely of digital pork chops and blockchain lettuce,” said Hasbro spokesperson Felicity Gamlins. “Our board is thrilled by her disruptive vision, especially since she hasn’t tried to unionize. Yet.”

Peppa reportedly collaborates with AI Optimus Prime and a ChatGPT-powered Mr. Monopoly, forming what executive assistant Karen Wheeler calls “the most emotionally unavailable design team in toy history.”

Not everyone is convinced. “Frankly, I’m worried,” confided senior designer Dave Trundle, as Peppa’s digitized snort echoed through the office intercom. “She deleted my pitch for ‘Furby 2: Electric Boogaloo’ and replaced it with ‘Furby, but it only speaks in hashtags.’”

Still, analysts are bullish. “AI Peppa can generate 10,000 toy ideas per minute, 9,999 of which are unfit for human children, but that one good idea is basically free,” said tech consultant Milo Prentiss. “And if we’re lucky, she’ll never demand a dental plan.”

Insiders confirm Hasbro is already beta-testing AI-based focus groups staffed entirely by sentient Cabbage Patch Dolls. Results have been called ‘deeply unsettling.’