LOS ANGELES—In a bold new strategy to ensure maximum Oscar attention for Olivia Wilde’s upcoming film “The Invite,” indie distributor A24 has announced plans to personally RSVP every member of the Academy to the movie, promising that each invitation will arrive by certified mail, singing telegram, and, should all else fail, by drone drop.

“We can’t risk anyone missing the nuanced symbolism of linen napkins and estranged cousins,” said A24 marketing head Persephone Mundle. “Our RSVP will arrive on 200gsm embossed cardstock and include a vegan amuse-bouche. If it’s good enough for Olivia Wilde, it’s good enough for Oscar consideration.”

Sources say that Academy voters will also receive limited-edition teasers featuring Wilde personally describing ‘cinematic tension’ while arranging seating charts and passive-aggressively assigning dietary restrictions to A-list actors. “After seeing the way she films an awkward toast, I knew I was in the presence of genius,” claimed made-up Academy member Carl Willoughby, who admitted he usually confuses movie nights with timeshare seminars.

Insiders report that A24 is so confident in the film’s chances, they’ve already issued a 10-part Instagram story explaining the deeper meaning of the hors d’oeuvres. “The shrimp cocktail is a metaphor for late capitalism, obviously,” said freelance Oscar consultant Jade Wisp, nodding contemplatively.

Wilde herself remains humble. “I just hope the Academy remembers to check their spam folders this time,” Wilde said, flashing a smile and handing out invitation-themed NFTs to the assembled press.