• Entertainment

Tarantino Names Paul Dano ‘Weakest F—ing Actor in SAG,’ Demands Daniel Day-Lewis Be Digitally Added to All Scenes in History

Penny PunchlineDecember 4, 2025

Quentin Tarantino sparked outrage by attacking Paul Dano’s acting and calling for Daniel Day-Lewis to be digitally inserted into every movie scene featuring Dano.

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• Sport

Russia Declares Triumphant ‘Capture’ Of Pokrovsk, Now Eyeing World Domination Via Empty Apartment Blocks

Penny PunchlineDecember 3, 2025

Russia announces the capture of Pokrovsk, touting it as a major victory despite ambiguity over the city’s actual significance.

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• Politics

Kai Trump Reveals Secret to Surviving Internet Trolls: ‘Inherited Unshakable Self-Esteem, Plus Muting Half the Country’

Penny PunchlineDecember 1, 2025

Kai Trump explains that she deals with negative social media comments through unwavering self-confidence, a supportive family, and selectively blocking critics.

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• Politics

Trump Administration Announces ‘Opposite Day’ Cabinet: Election Deniers to Lead Election Integrity, Foxes Eyed for Henhouse Security Roles

Penny PunchlineNovember 30, 2025

Prominent individuals who previously tried to overturn the 2020 U.S. election are now leading key federal roles in election oversight and civil rights offices.

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• Politics

Project 2025 Applicants Shocked to Learn Quoting Hitler Still Frowned Upon in Job Interviews

Penny PunchlineNovember 29, 2025

Leaked Heritage Foundation files show that Project 2025 job applicants cited Nazi theorists and other extremists as inspiration for future Trump administration roles.

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• Politics

University Of Adelaide Introduces ‘Philosophical Diplomatic Immunity’ For Staff Unpleasant To Opposing Viewpoints

Penny PunchlineNovember 28, 2025

University of Adelaide grants law professor Joanna Howe immunity from complaints by pro-choice campaigners, pledging to ignore grievances from those ideologically opposed to her views.

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• Politics

Senator Mark Kelly Stuns Nation By Suggesting Military Follow Laws, Pentagon Asks ‘Since When?’

Penny PunchlineNovember 26, 2025

Senator Mark Kelly faces Pentagon backlash after suggesting U.S. troops should only follow legal orders, prompting widespread confusion and concern among officials.

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• Entertainment

Russian Army Reports Widespread Emotional Damage After Hearing Anti-Kremlin Song Played by 18-Year-Old With Ukulele

Penny PunchlineNovember 26, 2025

An 18-year-old Russian street musician was found guilty of discrediting the Russian army after playing a banned anti-Kremlin song and fined 30,000 roubles.

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• Politics

Trump Demands Venezuela Return ‘Stolen Ballots’ and ‘Mystical Voting Algorithms’ by End of Business Day

Penny PunchlineNovember 25, 2025

Satire lampoons Trump's claim that Venezuela rigged the 2020 election by demanding the return of stolen ballots and 'mystical voting algorithms.'

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• Sport

Gaza Fitness Club Unveils New ‘Dodge the Rubble’ Cardio Class Amid Complete Facility Destruction

Penny PunchlineNovember 25, 2025

Gaza gym launches new rubble-based fitness classes for kids after facility's destruction.

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