• Entertainment

Paramount-Skydance and WBD Merge to Become Third Place Even Harder

Penny PunchlineMay 13, 2026

Paramount-Skydance and Warner Bros. Discovery defend their mega-merger by insisting it will make them even less competitive with top streaming giants.

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• Technology

Journalist Proves Humanity by Surviving Year With Humanoid Robots, AI Boyfriend, and Cooking Appliance that Cannot Be Reasoned With

Penny PunchlineMay 12, 2026

Tech journalist Joanna Stern survived a year living with household AI and robots, resulting in a new book, a traumatized family, and a kitchen robot that doubled as a modern art installation.

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• Economy

White House Economist Projects U.S. GDP Growth Will Soon Be Measured In ‘Laughter and Fist Bumps’

Penny PunchlineMay 11, 2026

White House economist Kevin Hassett projects U.S. GDP growth could surpass 5% due to a capital spending boom fueled by tax policy changes and onshoring initiatives.

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• Economy

Bank Finally Accepts Skeleton As Proof Of Death; Demands ‘Original Bones, Not Photocopies’

Penny PunchlineMay 10, 2026

After being denied access to his deceased sister’s bank account, a man in India brought her remains to the bank as proof of death, highlighting bureaucratic absurdities.

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• Entertainment

Werner Herzog’s ‘Bucking Fastard’ Shuns Cannes, Demands Film Festival Consist Entirely of Depressing Landscapes and Existential Goats

Penny PunchlineMay 10, 2026

Werner Herzog’s film 'Bucking Fastard' declined a Cannes Film Festival invite after organizers refused to offer a competition slot or adhere to Herzog’s unconventional demands.

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• Entertainment

Easterseals Disability Film Challenge Accidentally Inspires Record Number Of Able-Bodied Directors To Pretend They Understand Disability

Penny PunchlineMay 9, 2026

The 2026 Easterseals Disability Film Challenge saw a record-breaking number of filmmakers, many with questionable knowledge of disability, compete in a dramedy genre contest, ultimately awarding 'Don’t Forget to Dance' Best Film.

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• Politics

Florida Man Arrested for Failing to Follow Standardized List of People to Threaten Online

Penny PunchlineMay 7, 2026

Florida man Nathaniel Sanders II was arrested and federally charged after allegedly posting online threats to kill President Trump, Secretary Marco Rubio, and former Attorney General Pam Bondi.

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• Politics

Trump Unveils Revolutionary ‘Bomb-First, Negotiate-Later’ Diplomacy Model for Middle East Peace

Penny PunchlineMay 7, 2026

Donald Trump threatens Iran with intensified bombing if they don’t accept a new deal, despite reports of progress in negotiations.

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• Entertainment

James Cameron Sued for Allegedly Stealing Facial Features, Told to Return Eyebrows by Thursday

Penny PunchlineMay 7, 2026

Q’orianka Kilcher has filed a lawsuit against James Cameron and Disney, alleging they used her facial features without permission to design Avatar’s Neytiri.

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• Sport

Iran Demands Respect for Military Institutions, Asks FIFA to Add Revolutionary Guard Mascot to World Cup Parade

Penny PunchlineMay 7, 2026

Iranian football officials demand U.S. respect their military institutions at the 2026 World Cup, requesting IRGC tributes and themed fan experiences.

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