PALM BEACH, FL — In a robust show of his growing support for both redemption and questionable energy drink products, former President Donald Trump issued a full pardon Thursday to Adriana Camberos, a Florida woman who managed to get convicted of 5-Hour Energy drink fraud not once, but twice—remarkably, both times under Trump’s watchful eye.

Camberos, who previously had her sentence commuted by Trump in 2021 after she was caught masterminding a scheme involving counterfeit labels and “mystery liquid” sold as 5-Hour Energy, delighted prosecutors and fans of non-biodegradable beverages everywhere by immediately returning to her old post-commutation hobby—felony energy drink forgery.

“We believe in second chances,” said Trump in a statement, “and sometimes a third, fourth, or even fifth chance, especially if you are a fellow entrepreneur disrupting the American energy beverage market. I respect that hustle, folks. Tremendous hustle.”

Legal experts were reportedly baffled, though not shocked, by the decision. “It’s a bold precedent,” explained legal analyst Professor Linda Drupke. “We may see a wave of similar cases—repeat white-collar offenders banking on additional presidential clemency, especially if their crimes involve minor FDA regulations or mildly toxic fluids.”

Camberos herself thanked Trump for his unstinting support. “I’m looking forward to innovating new flavors and, God willing, not going to prison for a third time,” she told reporters from an undisclosed dollar store parking lot. “Orange Mango cough syrup is just the beginning.”

At press time, Florida officials were seen ordering extra pallets of Gatorade in anticipation of a 7-Eleven crime wave.