WASHINGTON D.C.—In a decisive nod to America’s time-honored tradition of utter confusion during election season, District Judge Marvin Calloway ruled Friday that President Trump’s executive order restricting mail-in voting may proceed, at least until someone more qualified—or with a magic 8-ball—offers an opinion.

“The judicial branch has always respected the executive’s right to introduce bewildering new barriers to voting at the very last minute,” Judge Calloway wrote in his 47-page opinion, reportedly composed entirely on the back of a Red Lobster placemat. “It would be un-American to make elections predictable or, God forbid, accessible.”

Legal experts are divided. “It’s an inspiring return to the founding principles of chaos and inconvenience,” said constitutional scholar Tiffany Griggs, who added, “This order will ensure that only the most persistent, envelope-licking patriots get to vote.”

The Trump administration praised the ruling as a victory for democracy. “We’re just trying to protect the sanctity of voting by making it as difficult as possible,” explained White House spokesperson Roy Hammersmith, holding up a map of post office closures. “It worked for literacy tests, poll taxes, and dial-up internet, so why not now?”

D.C. resident Maureen Flagg, seen clutching 17 mail-in ballot applications, said, “I look forward to spending my November standing in line, anxiously refreshing the CDC’s latest variant names, and hoping I don’t have to vote by carrier pigeon.”

Meanwhile, another federal judge is expected to weigh in next week, once they finish reading the executive order and decoding its handwritten footnotes.