BRUSSELS — In a bold move to modernize international sports, European Sports Commissioner Glenn Micallef announced plans to hold a high-level Panini sticker trading summit this month, intended to resolve both childhood disputes and the outcome of the FIFA World Cup.

“We can no longer ignore the overwhelming influence of the Panini sticker economy on global football,” Micallef declared to reporters while carefully peeling a rare foil Kylian Mbappé sticker from a waxy packet. “Frankly, if Croatia manages to complete their album first, we must consider the implications for tournament validity.”

The summit, to be hosted in the European Parliament’s designated Playroom C, will convene heads of state, eight-year-old children with impressive doubles collections, and shadowy figures known as Sticker Dads. The agenda will focus on pressing issues, such as whether duplicate goalkeepers count as a legitimate Euro or just an annoying repeat.

Czech delegate Tomáš Hrubeš expressed cautious optimism: “After years of exchanging my surplus Jan Bednarek stickers, I finally feel seen by the EU bureaucracy. We’ve always said, as goes the trading, so goes the Cup.”

Meanwhile, Marianne Leclerc of the French Sticker Cooperative urged restraint: “It’s a slippery slope. Today, we decide champions with stickers; tomorrow, we’ll resolve Brexit with holographic Shinies.”

FIFA has yet to comment, but sources suggest President Gianni Infantino is scrambling to locate his misplaced 1986 Maradona to ensure Argentina’s continued eligibility.