HOLLYWOOD—In yet another twist in the Jackson family saga, audiences were left searching in vain for any sign of Janet Jackson in the new Antoine Fuqua-directed biopic “Michael.” Despite elaborate CGI, practical effects, and a reported $4 million budget allocated for lifelike gloved hands, the film is entirely Janet-free, following her decision to, as sister LaToya Jackson put it, “kindly decline” to be portrayed onscreen, either in flesh or pixel.

“We tried everything,” said biopic casting director Cordelia Moon, gazing wistfully at a life-sized cutout of Tito Jackson. “We reached out to Janet’s team, to a Janet impersonator, even to her 2001 Super Bowl ensemble. In the end, all of them refused to comment or participate.”

Technology almost bridged the gap. “At one point, we considered using a hologram of Janet Jackson’s left shoe,” reported visual effects supervisor Dirk Bixby. “But the shoe’s agent was noncommittal, and the hologram itself was recovering from Coachella.”

While the film’s producers reportedly pledged to “honor Janet’s absence with a tasteful montage of closed doors and unanswered text messages,” not everyone was satisfied. “Honestly, I thought at least the Janet Barbie doll would get a cameo,” said LaToya, sporting a fedora and sequined eye patch. “But apparently, Mattel wanted too much creative control.”

In response to the news, Michael Jackson’s pet chimp Bubbles issued a statement through his publicist: “I respectfully decline to comment until I see the box office numbers.”