TIJUANA, MEXICO — In a bold diplomatic maneuver that cost the government an entire can of Febreze, Mexican president Claudia Sheinbaum announced Monday that the Iranian national football team can crash at their place for the World Cup after the United States replied to FIFA’s request with, ‘Sorry, gotta work early.’

The Iranian team, faced with a grueling schedule of group games on U.S. soil, was stunned to discover their Airbnb request had been ‘politely declined due to roommate drama.’ Fortunately, Mexico, always happy to help a neighbor in need, stepped in, offering the team a cozy base just across the border in Tijuana—and unlimited access to Sheinbaum’s famous bean dip.

“We’ve moved the entire squad into an Airbnb with only a slight cockroach problem,” confirmed Mexico’s Minister of Guest Towels, Diego Sánchez. “They’ll have bunk beds, a minifridge, and complimentary use of my cousin Miguel’s Netflix account.”

The U.S. State Department explained their decision: “We just didn’t have the bandwidth to wash all those extra towels between games,” said spokesperson Linda Wheaton. “Plus, this house party is strictly BYO pizza rolls.”

Iran’s head coach, Jalal Nahavandian, expressed gratitude for Mexico’s hospitality. “We are thankful to President Sheinbaum and look forward to exploring the vibrant culture of Tijuana—and the border wall,” he said, adding, “At least here, the only travel ban is after midnight.”

FIFA issued a statement calling the solution “a shining example of international sportsmanship, geopolitical compromise, and cross-border Wi-Fi sharing.”