• Politics

White House Warns Offshore Wind Farms Could Generate Giant Enemy Fans, Endanger National Security

Veronica TruthbombDecember 23, 2025

The Trump administration has halted all offshore wind farm projects, citing vague 'national security risks' including radar interference and a potential loss of freedom.

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• Politics

Senate Democrats Sue DOJ for Not Leaking Epstein Files Fast Enough; CBS Staffers Demand Right to Cancel News Before Management Does

Chester P. NonsenseDecember 23, 2025

Senate Democrats initiate legal action demanding faster release of Epstein files, while CBS staffers threaten to quit over being denied the right to self-cancel controversial stories.

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• Politics

Trump Threatens to Invade Venezuela Unless Maduro Surrenders All Oil And One (1) Golden Statue Of Himself

Gloria HyperboleDecember 23, 2025

Trump refuses to rule out war with Venezuela unless President Maduro hands over oil supplies and a custom golden statue, citing national interest and interior decorating needs.

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• Politics

Elysée Palace Staffer Arrested After Attempting to Trade Presidential Silverware for Limited Edition Pokémon Cards Online

Chester P. NonsenseDecember 22, 2025

A French presidential palace staffer was arrested for stealing €40,000 worth of tableware and attempting to trade it for rare Pokémon cards and cash online.

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• Politics

Trump Threatens Venezuela with War Unless Maduro Agrees to Ship Oil in MAGA-Branded Barrels

Buck MulliganDecember 22, 2025

President Trump refuses to rule out military action against Venezuela unless President Maduro agrees to rebrand Venezuelan oil with pro-Trump slogans.

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• Politics

Trump Explains Attacks on Judge’s Family: ‘If I Can’t Run the Trial, I’ll Run the Roast’

Gloria HyperboleDecember 22, 2025

After his arraignment, Donald Trump targets the judge and his family in a Mar-a-Lago speech as part of a newly-adopted strategy merging courtroom tactics with stand-up comedy.

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• Politics

White House Blames Bill Clinton for Absolutely Everything After Epstein File Release

Buck MulliganDecember 21, 2025

The White House has officially designated Bill Clinton as its all-purpose scapegoat following the release of Epstein files, attributing a wide range of unrelated issues to the former president.

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• Politics

DOJ Releases Epstein Files Written Entirely In Black Highlighter, Urges Public To ‘Connect The Dots, Maybe’

Buck MulliganDecember 21, 2025

The DOJ has released heavily redacted Epstein files, offering the public almost no new information and igniting further outrage over transparency.

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• Politics

South African Men Shocked to Discover Bodyguard Gig in Russia Actually Full-Time War, No Dental Plan

Gloria HyperboleDecember 21, 2025

Seventeen South African men who believed they were attending a bodyguard training course in Russia were instead sent to fight in Ukraine, prompting diplomatic efforts to secure their return.

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• Politics

South African Men Shocked to Discover ‘Personal Development Seminar’ at Russian Front Line Involves More Trenches, Less Mindfulness

Buck MulliganDecember 20, 2025

Seventeen South African men claim they were misled into fighting for Russia in Ukraine after being promised a personal development seminar organized by Duduzile Zuma-Sambudla.

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